Sitting on Top of the Bay

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Its been quite a while since I have stepped in front of the camera. This photo shoot really pushed me out of my comfort zone with my emotional pregnancy hormones & fear of heights.
Being pregnant has had me constantly battling myself with negative and self-conscious thoughts throughout these past few months. I don’t remember feeling like this during pregnancy with my son, Jayce. I was confident, happy and excited for every mini milestone of pregnancy.
I wonder if it has to do with carrying a girl that makes this pregnancy experience so different. I am a big believer in superstitions and being both Mexican and Chinese gives me a double dose to believe in! One of the Chinese pregnancy superstitions I read was that “when carrying a baby girl…she will steal all your beauty” and I am totally fine with that. It excuses all those days I refused to put make up on and style my hair. However, there is not a reason or superstition for throwing all my emotions out of whack. I would like to believe that she is stealing all of my sanity to become a future world leader respected for her intelligence and diplomacy. (:img_2799 I had no idea what location we were going to. All I knew was I would be wearing this beautiful sheer red dress with the possibility of my baby belly and my behind exposed to people hiking around the area, and that didn’t seem all that bad. When we got there Sam Graves, the photographer, lead us up to where he envisioned this magical photo set to be executed and explained where he wanted to position me. As I imagined carefully walking down the dirt path sprinkled with small rocks only to stand on an uneven ledge… immediately my hands started sweating and I started to feel light headed.

I AM SCARED OF HEIGHTS! WHAT THE HECK AM I DOING UP HERE?!img_2688I was doing my best not to freak the f*ck out at this spot. You can really see the fear through my body language with this one!  Knowing that I am now more clumsy and my center of gravity is way off.. my fear was intensified. Seriously, I could be just standing still and all of a sudden start leaning and tipping over. So, how could I not lose my balance once the wind catches into my dress? Ugh, my imagination can be a little to wild & crazy for my own good sometimes.
In addition, reading current events before driving to San Francisco  didn’t help. I was reading about people hiking who recently fell to their death because they were wearing flip flops. Of course… I was wearing flip flops that day – go figure, right?

Thankfully, my husband was there to help during the photo shoot. Making sure I was comfortable – well as comfortable as a person afraid of heights could be up there. I appreciated Sam being so understanding with my fear of heights. In doing so we ended up getting some pretty amazing shots together!

Once I was able to change back into my maternity workout pants and ultra boosts, that view over looking San Francisco was a thousand times more enjoyable.img_2790
img_2779Thankfully, my husband was there to help during the photo shoot. Making sure I was comfortable – well as comfortable as a person afraid of heights could be up there. I appreciated Sam being so understanding with my fear of heights. In doing so we ended up getting some pretty amazing shots together!

Once I was able to change back into my maternity workout pants and ultra boosts, that view over looking San Francisco was a thousand times more enjoyable. I am so happy with how these photos turned out. Hopefully I can squeeze in one more session before she arrives in October!
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Photographer: Sam Graves // Dress: Sew Trendy Accessories

 

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